Have you ever really taken a moment to think about how you to talk about yourself? I mean really…

I notice this a lot because I have interviewed lots of people for various roles and I’m struck time and again by how many people are very negative about themselves. But it’s not just interview situations, it’s everyday life… Perhaps you feel it’s some sort of self-deprecating humour? But have you ever stopped to consider what it is doing for you?

Eventually your inner stories and thoughts will create your reality. Your success or failure – large or small – depends on your inner programming (beliefs, attitudes and thoughts about yourself) which is linked to what you say about yourself. Your self-talk will become a “self-fulfilling prophesy”.

You’ve probably heard the oft-repeated quote: What you think, you become, and it’s true.

Consider these thoughts:
I can’t remember names
I am so disorganised
It’s just one of those days
I’m just not the creative type

Before long, you believe these words and you become someone who can’t remember names, or is disorganised and so on.

So, what can you do to turn your negative self-talk into something that’s positive?

#1 – notice when you are saying something negative to yourself. Some people are not aware of the chatter inside their heads, so stop and take notice of your self-talk.

#2 – be compassionate. Ask yourself this: would you speak like that to a loved one – a friend, your partner, your colleague? If not, don’t say it to yourself.

#3 – say something nice instead. How about turning those negative phrases into something that’s positive? Imagine you are preparing for an interview, rather than “I hate interviews, I’m rubbish at interviews, I always mess them up”, how about "I am well-prepared for my interview and will do my very best".

#4 – visualise a positive outcome - see yourself being successful or achieving the result you want.

So in short, be careful of your self-talk because eventually it could become your reality. So ask yourself, would you want that?