Weight gain in recovery feels like the worst thing. I’ve been through the process of gaining weight myself after an eating disorder, so I feel you.  It can feel hard, frustrating and disheartening. Worse - you might even feel like dieting or restricting once again.

Today I’m sharing the tips that helped me cope during this period and come out feeling stronger than ever.

Personally, I’ve been through recovery from two different eating disorders and in both instances my weight journey has been different.  I’m not going to share exact numbers because I don’t think that’s helpful and I know it can be triggering.

This is what happened to me: during my recovery from orthorexia (which spanned a few months), I gained weight.

After I stopped my extreme restrictions, my weight stayed roughly the same for a bit then shot up (that was the hardest bit) and now it’s gone down, and settled at a comfortable weight for several years.

This weight gain is really normal when you stop restricting, because your body doesn’t know whether it can trust you around food, or whether you’ll keep feeding your body.

What happens is that you eventually arrive at your set point weight range, which is the range of weight that your body can effortlessly maintain with no need to diet and restrict…

And this is the ultimate aim – to be at a weight that your body is comfortable… without restricting.

To be clear though - everybody’s experience with weight restoration is different – you might notice weight gain in a specific area, like around your waist. That’s really normal and over time this will distribute around the body more naturally.

You might also struggle with how you look (I certainly did).

Some bodies gain weight quicker than others and yes it can be hard to cope with a changing body. It was for me – on the one hand I wanted to gain weight because I knew I had to for my long-term health, but on the other hand I struggled with seeing my body change.

What I will say – to give you some assurance – is that I’m content with where my body is at now, at a heavier weight. So keep that hope alive.

You might suffer from a loss of identity. For a while, you were your eating disorder (or your diet).

Dieting and EDs almost give people a purpose.

During my orthorexia, I was the super healthy one. The one that made the best food choices. My rigid rules and routines left little head space for anything else.

And you might find the same – you lost your identity, but I promise as you let go of dieting, or your eating disorder, you’ll have more time and energy, which allows you to take control of your life and its direction.

 So here are my eight tips…

#1 Have a list of reasons to recover

This may change as you progress, but I really encourage you to write down a list of things you will gain besides weight.

It might be physical – perhaps you will gain more energy, or improve your hair and nails, or not have cold hands and feet all the time (when you’ve deprived your body of food, it can become malnourished).

It might be mental – your mental health might improve, or you might benefit from not having to think about food all the time, or stressing about eating in front of friends and family.

Maybe your recovery will allow you to be more present in the moment – attending parties and hanging out with friends and enjoying the beautiful moments in life.

#2 Know that your body will change

For real recovery from either dieting or EDs, you must accept your body will change.

You don’t have to love the idea, but you will have to live with it. There will be weight gain when you settle into a new pattern of eating, and eventually you’ll reach your set point weight.

Also, don’t expect to stay at one “ideal weight”. Remember that set point weight is a range.. That means there’s a range of weight where your body is comfortable, so don’t hold on too tight to one exact number.

#3 Prepare for overshoot

Ack this is hard! It happened to me – I’d been so restrictive in my eating that when I started re-feeding myself I felt like I put on so much weight.

But as I faced my fear foods, everything started to normalise and I no longer wanted to eat bucket loads of crisps.  I focused on feeding myself both nutrient dense foods and fun foods, and over time my weight settled.

It went up – overshot my happy weight – and then went down and settled to where I am now.

Overshoot is apparently a really important part of returning to your set point weight (especially when you’ve been really restrictive) and it’s your body’s way of restoring the best ratio of muscle, bone and fat.

#4 You are more than a body

Given the diet culture we are surrounded by, sometimes it’s hard to remember that it’s not just about our bodies, we are more than a body.

I really encourage you to connect with other aspects of yourself – who are you, what are you like, what do you care about, what are your strengths.

Start thinking about yourself in terms of your qualities – are you kind, outgoing, fun, enthusiastic, compassionate etc?

#5 Wear comfortable clothes

This is a huge one.  I had to say goodbye to large chunks of my wardrobe – which I sold or gave to charity.

For a while I wore the same things over and over.  Eventually when my weight settled I went out and bought more clothes…

But honestly getting rid of my clothes was so good for me.  It’s not nice having tight clothes on your body… sizing up was one of the most positive things I did, and then when you have more comfortable clothing you are more positive about your body.

#6 Reduce body checking

The more you body check, the more aware you are of your body and that makes you feel anxious and can stop recovery.

I learnt that for a while I needed to avoid lingering over mirrors – I still don’t have any long mirrors in the house – it’s on purpose! I learnt to focus more on how clothes make me feel…

I know some people have found it helpful to have a timer when getting ready so that you’re not stuck looking in the mirror for too long.

#7 Appreciate your body for what it does

…rather than how it looks.

Choosing to respect your body no matter what can be empowering. With clients I focus on helping them achieve body neutrality, where you focus on appreciating the body for what it does.

A vehicle that allows you to live, laugh, to run, dance and hang out with friends. Think of the things you love to do and how your body enables that. Then send some gratitude and appreciation to that part of your body.

#8 Get qualified help

Find someone to work with if you need to. Both in recovery from an ED or recovery from extreme dieting, having someone by your side and supporting you through the process can be invaluable.

There are many people that work in this area – I do so myself and if you want to find out how I can help you, you can book a call here to find out how.